Learn to Tell Your Mind “No”

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” — Viktor Frankl

People often overlook the simplest things in life. Instead they seek the complicated and spend their time searching and accumulating more knowledge. They neglect to recognize that although they may understand something intellectually, the benefits will only come when you put it into your experience. It’s when the intellectual transmutes into the ‘Ahhh’ moment. It is a piece of the puzzle falling into place.

If you are seeking to change your life, the starting point is becoming aware of where you are placing your attention. Consciousness always follows thought, and your thoughts are made up of the beliefs that you have accepted as true. It is through these beliefs that you perceive your own personal world.

Your beliefs come from basically two different sources. The first was an imprinting that has been passed down through the centuries. You were born with it. The second is a download that happens the moment you enter into this world. From zero to about seven years you basically learn to model the behaviours of those around you. As you go through life, you are taught or programmed the societal definitions of what constitutes good and bad behaviour. You are taught how and what to think.

As you grow older, you can either question those beliefs/thought streams or you can go along with them. If you go along with them, you become like a sleepwalker. Day in day out you do the acceptable. You never question if the propaganda machine has maybe swung too far into the negative.

If you chose to question, there are points where you may feel like you are trapped within a labyrinth. You go down one road thinking you found the answers only to discover that the new information is bogus. Eventually, however, your search will bring you to a new understanding that rearranges the picture, and replaces the belief that was limiting you.

It is all very simple. What you focus upon comes back to you. The problem is most people do not take ownership for what is going on in their minds. Instead we project our responsibility for our choices onto an outer world. For many of us, we think we are thinking, but in actuality we are listening to an internal monologue. It is a monologue that you are making up and in it you play all the characters, and it is shaping your world.

I read somewhere that we think around 90,000 thoughts a day. About 90% of those thoughts were either about the day before or past happenings. Only 10% is about new thoughts. Now, whether this statement was a true or fiction, didn’t really matter to me. It made me think about my own thought processes. How much of my energy was being directed to old situations? Re-hashing past happenings with what I would like to have said or done.

To change your thinking you have no other choice but to consciously make an effort to police your thoughts. Throughout the day stop and listen to what is going on in your head. If monologue is about the past, you have two choices: if it is causing you pain or depleting your energy — let it go. If it is giving you an excellent state of being — ride the wave.

To let go of a negative state of being you have to rewrite the software program and rewire the circuitry of a negative state of being. Start by bringing yourself into the moment. You can use the following: Stop and ask yourself, “What time is it?” Answer yourself, “The time is now.” Ask: “Where am I?” Answer: “I am here. The time is now.” Take a few slow and deep breaths and now ask yourself: “Why am I letting this event, person, or situation rent space in my brain for free?” If your answer is filled with anger then do whatever you need to do to let it go.

But what do you do when the voice that is rattling around in your brain won’t shut up? Don’t like the story — switch the station. Change the subject. Just exercise your free will and learn to say “no.” Actually practicing it out loud is one of the ways to get it into your vocabulary. You could even learn to say “no” in different languages. Learn to tell your mind “no.”

Over the years, there have been numerous individuals who have provided a variety of techniques for re-wiring your thinking. They can be found all over the web. Personally, I think the easiest approach is just start monitoring your thoughts. Weed out the beliefs, habits and expectations that are not offering you a return on your energy investment. Consciously change your thinking. You change your thinking — and you change your state of being. Through this flowing of energy situations of similar thought are attracted to you.